KMFDM In Your Face
JOHN VAN EATON, WHOM EVERYONE WILL THINK NICOLE BLACKMAN IS RIPPING OFF WHEN THEY HEAR
HER ORIGINAL
VERSION AND THEY GO: "Whoa, she's rippin' off the red stripe Pepe Le Peu guy who
opened the show for KMFDM on the fall tour." "You idiot,
did you see her do it in the spring?" "No, my Mom wouldn't let me go to the
show." "Well, you snooze, you lose!!!" And then one of them will stomp
the other one with big black boots and we'll have to issue a press release about it
because they'll be wearing KMFDM shirts when they get
photographed coming out of the police precinct in handcuffs and some little old lady in
South Dakota will call TVT and start saying how the band
incites violence and must be stopped and she'll get a ton of records together and make a
bonfire out of them, except she's half-illiterate and she
gathers up a bunch of KLF records instead and everyone figures, "Gee, must be a great
album" and buys up KLF records by the boxload and the
band ends up with a hit catalog. Great. Just great...
The devil told me: " If you want to defeat your enemy, you first must learn to sing
her song." And though I walk through the valley of the shadow of
death, I fear not because.. Wait a minute ... I fear! You fuckin' bet I fear because
EVERYTHING'S EVIL!!! EVERYTHING SUCKS!!! LIFE IS
HARD!!! Oh, but when life is hard, the people are so beautiful... Oh yeah, I'm still
drinking because I can't stand thinking... about living alone in this
world... without you. Then bus tokens fall from the sky , lighting up the night like so
many cats and dogs kissing crocodiles, if you don't play with the
ironing board, you don't get any ice cream. The next thing you know, 47 bibles sold every
minute, every hour that's an extra 2,820 people. Very
unsexy, very significant problem... And I know, you just go on, you watch what you're
watching, you do what you're doing. You can't blame that shit
on me. But the thing I've gotta know... Why was anyone even watching 90210? HEY! IT'S NOT
FUNNY! IT'S QUITE SERIOUS! THIS IS YOUR
LIFE! THIS IS YOUR FUCKING LIFE! And if you're lucky, it can be more than just a bad
collection of bad magazines bad movies and bad
television written by bad writers about bad people with bad wife killing problems. Oh yea,
we just laugh at the harsh reality because it's too painful to
realize. That we are both SKY HIGH AND FUCKED! And that being proven not guilty is not the
same thing as being innocent. Selling out is not the
same thing as cashing in...Life is about living... can we please get started? But before
we throw all this shit back on the truck, I need to hear
everyone in the room scream FUCK!!! And now without any further ado, I'd like to bring
Zane's light show to you, and as my stupid little poem comes
to an end, I give to you : KMFDM!!!
JOHN VAN EATON STEALS HIS SHIT FROM NICOLE BLACKMAN BUT THAT'S OKAY. SOMEDAY SHE'LL STEAL
ALL HIS
KEYBOARDS AND THEY'LL BE EVEN. HE STILL CAN'T PAINT HIS NAILS WORTH A SHIT ANYWAY. HE
THINKS NAIL POLISH
REMOVER IS FOR SISSIES, SO HE JUST CHIPS THE SILVER NAIL POLISH OFF WITH HIS SWISS ARMY
KNIFE AND MAKES THESE
LITTLE DIGS IN HIS NAILS WHICH DRIVES NICOLE BANANAS. ALMOST AS BANANAS AS IF NICOLE TRIED
TO RESTRING A
GUITAR WITH YARN. WHY ARE YOU READING THIS? I'M ALL HOPPED UP ON ADVIL AND I'VE GOTTA
BABY-SIT PRINCE THIS
WEEKEND. SHEESH...
Guten Abend Damen und Herren. The other day I was talking to Satan...Und der Teufel hat
mir gesagt: "If you want to defeat your enemy, Du musst
erst ihr Lied singen lernen." Ach mein lieber Gott! Es gibt zu viele Damen mit
schwarzem Haar. Entschuldigen Sie? Noch ein Bier bitte. Ja, Ich
trinke weil es undenkbar ist zu leben in dieser Welt ohne dich. Ich liebe dich, aber Du
liebst mich nicht. Und ja, wir rauchen und ja, wir lachen denn
mein Deutsch ist Scheisse! Ja ja, Ich weiss das... Also denn, ALLES SCHEISSE !!! IMMER !!!
IN DER STRASSE UND IN MEINEM ZIMMER
!!! Alles tot, alles brute... Wir sind �ber alles UND VERR�CKT !!! And when I say that I
love you it just means I'm going to hit and run you over and
leave you at the side of the road for the alligators to finish off. Nichts ist klar Herr
Kommisar...Then bus tokens fall from the sky like so many cats
and dogs kissing crocodiles, if you don't play with the ironing board, you don't get any
ice cream. Was ist 90210? Also denn was ist alles? Ist alles ein
kleines oder ein grosses Problem? Oder vielleicht jezt ein schlechter witz...
Entschuldigung? Wo ist mein anderes Bier? Ohne Bier bin Ich tot, and my
stupid little poem comes to an end. Thank you for coming, John is tired... And I bring to
you: KMFDM !!!